Saturday, July 28, 2012

Please, Just Give Me A Lobotomy...

I need brain make my brain "normal".  At least that's how I feel.  I am just daunted by the never ending task of what my brain tells me to do, and think, and feel.  It is too much work sometimes. I am tired of it.  I just want to "be".  Is that too much to ask for?  I just want to think the way I am supposed to. I just want to not worry and feel like a normal person.  I just want it to change it and NOW!  I have struggled with this since I was around 13!  I am 41 now...can I catch a break?  Please!  I have been on every med, talked to many therapists and done the things I am supposed to. Yet I feel I am being punished somehow.  I just want my brain to finally comply with my wishes!


  1. Sometimes, almost a joke but almost too serious, I ask God for a different brain. I want one that works right, too, that won't get stuck in anxious or depressed places. But i haven't gone through as much as you have yet. I hope you start feeling better soon.

  2. I feel for you Shannon...

    I dont believe that any of the drugs work - its all about what you think...

    They way you change how you think is by putting positive stuff in that will "stick"

  3. I met a girl in Virginia Beach that had a limbic leukotomy (brain surgery)after deep brain stimulation failed to help her OCD. Med's and therapy did not help her and she was practically a prisoner sitting in a chair all day due to OCD. Anyway, the surgery did not work. She had about 6 months where she felt better (I actually met her in a OCD group) and then heard she'd reverted right back to debilitating OCD.
    Otherwise I would sign up for the surgery .. Gosh, it would be such a relief to have OCD gone.

  4. I feel the exact same way! If I could just be "normal" would I be happier all around? I would like to believe that it's everyone else that isn't normal....I can wish.

  5. I'm sorry you're feeling this way. Believe me, I have thought the same thing and gotten so frustrated. Mental illness is frustrating! I get tired of it. But we have to hang in there.