Tuesday, May 29, 2012

I Have No Idea

I have no idea today, about anything.  It is hard to make decisions when you are OCD and anxiety ridden and you are basically doing it for the first time in your life. My problem?  My husband gets out of the Marines in 9 months and we have no idea where we should go or what we should do. The two places we have considered moving? 1) Back to Florida where all of our family lives, but we don't really like the area all that much. 2) A small town in Northern California where friends live but there isn't really a promise of great lively hood.

I mean up to this point in our regular lives and our married lives we have never made the decision on our own. The Marines have always told us where we are moving and what we will be doing.  You think it would be a God send moment of freedom to choose. But is really a terrifying experience of "What Now?"  We are still young. Both around age 40 and we still have a 13 year old daughter and a 17 year old son. Right now we live in San Diego in Base housing.  I love San Diego, my husband, not so much. My daughter would be happy to move to either place, my son would be happy to never move again. Of course all our family wants us to move back to Florida.  But we have never lived around them, married, with children etc... how would that affect us? There are good and bad points to that.  If we moved to N. California we would be far from family and I would at least feel a bit guilty. I mean aren't we supposed to always choose family?

I guess I have been waiting for a BIG SIGN that is flashing with bright lights to jump out in front of me and say "Go Here!" -But that hasn't happened. We honestly could move anywhere in the United States right now....But where?  How do you decide? How do you make giant decisions?  I need help here!  My panic is on overload! And to top it all off I seem to be binge eating.  I think I may have an unrealized problem with that, to boot!


  1. I can so relate to your wish for a big sign with flashing lights telling you what to do. I have yearned for that so many times, because I have trouble making decisions too.

    Give yourself a break, though, because it is the first time you and your husband have had to consider these things. It must seem overwhelming. Sometimes I have to remind myself to take it one step at a time. Maybe even just beginning to write down pros and cons of the different places, or making a list of all the places you'd like to consider, would get you started?

  2. That is a very hard decision to make. Best wishes. You'll know when it feels right.

  3. I remember when my husband retired after 23 years in the service. He had a retirement/retainer coming in but needed to work as we had 3 kids all in college. It was terrifying, we hadn't had to worry about a steady paycheck or layoffs or anything really for so many years. But it will all work out. Keep in mind that very few decisions you make are irreversible. We ended up moving a couple more times after he retired, but the companies paid for it. I worried so much but none of my worrying did any good..that is the sad part. Good luck to your family. I lived in San Diego for 8 years and loved it so much.

  4. It is a hard decision. I wish it would just be made for us. But Thanks Guys! (Gals!)